GoodBye 2020

What once was will never be

"2020" We may never ever need to say that again. In a few days, we will be starting a new year. I'm so looking forward to it, but I hope I'm not the only one who can say that despite the challenges of 2020, I experienced the most growth both personally and emotionally than I have ever done throughout my 46 years. Let's dive right into it!

Here's my going-into-2020 family photo. One year ago, I was newly divorced with new dog and two amazing adult children. I was focused on starting a new life and my independence - I was tightening my boots for an exciting era of growing my work life and my business, bringing stability to my family, and possibly entering the dating scene. To be honest, it was a little scary and delightful at the same time. My new normal was ready to emerge into something wonderful, then the pandemic hit. 
My first thought was that nothing really would change. I was working from home for the last 12 years, so I was accustomed to being at home most of the time and what's a little mask wearing going to do. 

Well, the challenges started to roll in. First, I was starting a new relationship with an amazing man, and as we were just getting to know each other, there was a statewide mandate to stay at home. Additionally, my daughter was in college in an area deemed as a hot spot for its growing rate of viral cases. Each time my son left for work, I was very worried about the risks he faced too. My hopes for an amazing year began to crumble.  I was Blessed to still have steady income, but the unforeseen challenges began to pile a mile high.  I couldn't do events with my clothing business which was the majority of its income source. I couldn't visit my friends and family like I wanted to. I couldn't even find toilet paper and it was running low!

Then the voice in my head said the most important words I needed to hear, "Stop focusing on what you don't have and focus on what you do!"  Pushing out the negative thoughts led to a movement inside me to focus on positivity.  I made my glass half full instead of seeing it as half empty.
Seeking positivity allowed me to have more creative thoughts. Challenges began to generate opportunities.  I began to focus on my needs and how I was going to stop worrying and do more praying. Building stronger relationships with God and self was the goal. 

These challenges are temporary and what once was will never be again. Even if history starts to repeat itself, I'm stronger and different from my 2020 self. ​So how do you make it through a global pandemic and say you are better than before it started? I discovered three things:  Maintaining what works, Trying new things, and Promoting Self Love.

Maintaining what works - In the absence of being physically present, you can show and interact with love ones by answering when they need you, using Facetime, and reaching out through cards or texts. I remember when my son and I were doing a walkthrough of a house I was thinking about buying.  He and I included my daughter by having her on Facetime. She was able to see what we saw and hear our thoughts about the house in real time. She also asked questions to the realtor. She was in a sense there. Yes, it was different, but it worked. 

Trying something new -Another challenge was the lack of social interaction. I'm an outgoing person. I imagined myself visiting museums, going on vacations, enjoying new restaurants and attending festivals and concerts especially with my new guy. Unfortunately, a lot of the activities were canceled. Luckily, I  could still go on walks with my dog, spend the day at the beach, and learn new things too. One new skill I wanted to master was baking cakes. I could never make the layers the same size or make it stand up straight. With the pandemic encouraging me to stay home, I started practicing with my favorite, the jelly cake. All of my baking challenges were just opportunities to build my strength in trying. Growth often occurs from failure.

Promoting Self Love -I've had a lot of time to reflect during 2020.  So many things happened that were beyond my control that I had to rediscover what at the end of the day makes me happy.  Sitting down to a movie with a glass of wine, studying a different language, reading a book, treating myself to a bubble bath in the middle of the day, enjoying a walk on the beach, or even having a quiet moment of meditation were all ways I showed myself self love.  When you try, you can make something beautiful from very little. For example, I began to mix lavender oil and shea butter with cane sugar, honey, and coconut oil to create an all-natural scrub. Along with warm water, my bath tub became an oasis for refreshing my soul and exfoliating my skin. 

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What once was SHOULD NEVER be again... The most important thing I gained from 2020 is that despite whatever hardships I will ever face, I possess everything already inside me to overcome them.  I am a warrior, I am a fighter, I am a lover, I am a protector, and most of all... I AM ENOUGH!
May all new experiences brighten our present and tomorrow. Happy New Year to you and your family!
Many Blessings to All in 2021!
​Wishing you all the love - Carla