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No Where to Now Here

10/4/2021

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No Where and Now Here are the same letters in the same exact order but are totally different perspectives! ♥️ Sharing my experience for if I will ever need to revisit it again and for anyone who may need to hear this… ​
When something is going wrong in your life, don’t get caught up in the why. Don’t worry about why people upset or disappoint you. You will not find your solutions there. It’s a distraction from God’s Purpose… ​
I’ve been tried to the ten thousandth degree recently and retreated to complaining mode (asking Why is this happening? Why I’m going through this? Why all my efforts seem to exacerbate the situation?) There was no peace to be found there.

The situation kept pressing, and yes, the feeling of helplessness was slowly tearing me down. I needed to be there, because I needed to see how I was focusing on the external. I reached out instead of reaching in! In that particular area, I forgot about what God has done in every other area of my life. For several days, I wanted so badly to fix it, claim the victory, and move on that I was putting band aids on battle wounds! Me, of all people whom God has carried through many storms before forgot to give this one over to Him! I slipped up.I’m always telling others that “God’s got it”! And when I reached a mountain, I forgot to remind myself of that! The time I wasted trying to climb the mountain by myself is time I will never get back!

Well, I definitely remember now!!! God moves mountains so there ain’t no reason to waste energy on a climb! He got me! I’m not helpless! I am strong! I’m not weak! My Faith is powerful! I’m not weary! I am blessed!

​Today, I ask for His Forgiveness for my hesitation in turning this over to Him. Today, I’m thankful for the reminder that every situation is covered by things bigger than me.  And today, I am most grateful for that humbling moment when the sun rays began to shine through the clouds again. I AM NOW HERE☀️💫♥️🙏🏾👑 #waymaker
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GoodBye 2020

12/28/2020

4 Comments

 

What once was will never be

"2020" We may never ever need to say that again. In a few days, we will be starting a new year. I'm so looking forward to it, but I hope I'm not the only one who can say that despite the challenges of 2020, I experienced the most growth both personally and emotionally than I have ever done throughout my 46 years. Let's dive right into it!
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Here's my going-into-2020 family photo. One year ago, I was newly divorced with new dog and two amazing adult children. I was focused on starting a new life and my independence - I was tightening my boots for an exciting era of growing my work life and my business, bringing stability to my family, and possibly entering the dating scene. To be honest, it was a little scary and delightful at the same time. My new normal was ready to emerge into something wonderful, then the pandemic hit. 
My first thought was that nothing really would change. I was working from home for the last 12 years, so I was accustomed to being at home most of the time and what's a little mask wearing going to do. 
Well, the challenges started to roll in. First, I was starting a new relationship with an amazing man, and as we were just getting to know each other, there was a statewide mandate to stay at home. Additionally, my daughter was in college in an area deemed as a hot spot for its growing rate of viral cases. Each time my son left for work, I was very worried about the risks he faced too. My hopes for an amazing year began to crumble.  I was Blessed to still have steady income, but the unforeseen challenges began to pile a mile high.  I couldn't do events with my clothing business which was the majority of its income source. I couldn't visit my friends and family like I wanted to. I couldn't even find toilet paper and it was running low!
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Then the voice in my head said the most important words I needed to hear, "Stop focusing on what you don't have and focus on what you do!"  Pushing out the negative thoughts led to a movement inside me to focus on positivity.  I made my glass half full instead of seeing it as half empty.
Seeking positivity allowed me to have more creative thoughts. Challenges began to generate opportunities.  I began to focus on my needs and how I was going to stop worrying and do more praying. Building stronger relationships with God and self was the goal. 
These challenges are temporary and what once was will never be again. Even if history starts to repeat itself, I'm stronger and different from my 2020 self. ​So how do you make it through a global pandemic and say you are better than before it started? I discovered three things:  Maintaining what works, Trying new things, and Promoting Self Love.
Maintaining what works - In the absence of being physically present, you can show and interact with love ones by answering when they need you, using Facetime, and reaching out through cards or texts. I remember when my son and I were doing a walkthrough of a house I was thinking about buying.  He and I included my daughter by having her on Facetime. She was able to see what we saw and hear our thoughts about the house in real time. She also asked questions to the realtor. She was in a sense there. Yes, it was different, but it worked. 
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Trying something new -Another challenge was the lack of social interaction. I'm an outgoing person. I imagined myself visiting museums, going on vacations, enjoying new restaurants and attending festivals and concerts especially with my new guy. Unfortunately, a lot of the activities were canceled. Luckily, I  could still go on walks with my dog, spend the day at the beach, and learn new things too. One new skill I wanted to master was baking cakes. I could never make the layers the same size or make it stand up straight. With the pandemic encouraging me to stay home, I started practicing with my favorite, the jelly cake. All of my baking challenges were just opportunities to build my strength in trying. Growth often occurs from failure.
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Promoting Self Love -I've had a lot of time to reflect during 2020.  So many things happened that were beyond my control that I had to rediscover what at the end of the day makes me happy.  Sitting down to a movie with a glass of wine, studying a different language, reading a book, treating myself to a bubble bath in the middle of the day, enjoying a walk on the beach, or even having a quiet moment of meditation were all ways I showed myself self love.  When you try, you can make something beautiful from very little. For example, I began to mix lavender oil and shea butter with cane sugar, honey, and coconut oil to create an all-natural scrub. Along with warm water, my bath tub became an oasis for refreshing my soul and exfoliating my skin. 

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What once was SHOULD NEVER be again... The most important thing I gained from 2020 is that despite whatever hardships I will ever face, I possess everything already inside me to overcome them.  I am a warrior, I am a fighter, I am a lover, I am a protector, and most of all... I AM ENOUGH!
May all new experiences brighten our present and tomorrow. Happy New Year to you and your family!
Many Blessings to All in 2021!
​Wishing you all the love - Carla
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Health Awareness Month

9/9/2020

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Women's Mental Health

Be Aware Of Your Internal Signs
We all lead stressful lives. At some point, you have to slow down and take a step back.  Whether you are worried about your kids or a little short on a bill or maybe your friend said something you did not like, there is always something to fret about in the daily life of a woman.  Despite what is going on in our lives, we are expected to still meet our responsibilities and step up to our roles as mom, leader, confidant, guider, and coordinator.  But what happens when you realize there is overload?  How does a woman cope when the pressure is on max?  One indicator of meeting my breaking point is a noticeable increase in anxiety.  When I get nervous or start to become short tempered with those around me, those are my internal signs that I need to take a break - I need to step away.  There are so many factors that happen beyond your control.  I have lost my Father, then Mother, then Brother-in-law, then Sister, then another Sister.  I know what being on the verge of mental breakdown feels like. Grief is no joke. 
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Carla is wearing these earrings. Click image to shop.

Healing and Recovering
Unfortunately, when we are down, our life demands are still spinning. That is why I say the mental health of women is so important but often overlooked.  We could be having the toughest day, but kids still need to be picked up from school and dinner is still expected by 6PM.  You learn how to move on without dealing or healing from the problem.  
Well, like I said in the video, you have to heal from your present in order to have a brighter future. With healing in mind, here are some resources to help manage your life and be the best you can be:

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1.  Talk to someone. Do not let negativity or what you are worrying about brew.  It is so much easier to talk with a family member or close friend about your problem, than to let it snowball. If you are in a disagreement with a spouse or significant other - talk to them about it. 
2. Pray! Rely on your Faith during your time of need. Some things you may not want to talk about with a person.  Always take your worries to God for He alone is all powerful and can resolve it.
3. Spend time with yourself.  Take a break when you need to. Go get your nails done or have some ice cream.  You can also go on an overnight trip. Plan a mini vacation where you can relax and recover. 
4. Seek professional help.  There seems to be a stereotype that goes along with therapy, but you have to ignore it. Talking with a non-biased person confidentially can go a long way. Keep in mind, that most healthcare plans cover counseling services.

I hope this blog post helps you with whatever you are going through.  Know that we all have good days and bad days - it's how you work through them that matters.  Comment below with how you cope with life's punches. I would love to see what you do. 
Be Blessed today and always, Carla
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Create Your Space

7/30/2020

3 Comments

 

your environment matters

I've spent my whole life thinking of others and mostly, putting others' needs before my own.  It was part of my upbringing, the culture of what I was learned to do. Don't get me wrong, taking care of others is not a curse; it is, in fact, rewarding on many levels. It is still instilled in me, but that priority has changed.  
In 2016, I started my metamorphosis.  It was not on purpose.  I've always desired to own my own business, but I knew I could not afford to support my family if I quit my main job.  Instead, I started growing my business on weekends and late nights.  Many people will call it a "side hustle"; I now call it my expansion period.  Having the ability to change your work habits to gain what you need in order to grow is HUGE!
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Here in 2020, I have allowed myself to flow. I embrace change and I am comfortable in it. I'm also more aware of what I need around me to facilitate growth in my personal and professional life. I have long envisioned my SPACE - a space where I can enjoy my love of the outdoors, pray, eat, work, and a place that radiates my personality and level of comfort - A SPACE TRULY FOR ME!
The transformation of my space is not just physical.  It was necessary that it feeds my emotional side. A friend recently told me that "you have to let people do their thing and just watch and support".  When I seem to fall back into the overly protective mom rituals (that's a tough habit to break) - I am reminded to  "Let them kids be!"
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It has a Breakfast Cafe feel where I can relax before starting my busy dayl!
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The sound of the outdoors is my background music while I enjoy a comfortable home workspace.
PictureBirds in flight show the ability to embrace movement and change.
  • Taking a more hands-off approach has truly helped me refocus my energy into my self-growth. My space reminds me that I embrace change because growth is often uncomfortable.  My space is my sanctuary, so I can be relaxed in my thinking and creative modes.  This decoration of space means a lot to me, since everything and anything I do is always reciprocal of many hours of prayer.  I put God first in my decisions.  I am well aware of what God has done in my life and fully acknowledge that if it was not for Him, I would not be the strong, independent woman I am today.  This space was created for me to growth my life and faith. ~ Carla

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delivered by grace

1/14/2020

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Everyone has had a Delivered-By-Grace moment. Check out this video blog and be sure to click and buy the items in this post. Special thanks to my family and friends... without God and what He does through you, I would be a grain of sand on a rocky shore... Much Love, Carla
Shopping Links:
​Women's Small - XL Delivered by Grace Inspirational T-shirt

​Plus size Delivered by Grace Inspirational Women's Plus Size T shirt

​
Purple Leggings
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A new chapter begins

11/19/2019

2 Comments

 
Love is patient, love is kind... I was married for 21 years. The journey to separating 10/13/2019 and finalizing our divorce 11/12/2019 was an easy one. I’m a praying woman. I’m a reasonable woman. I was a good wife.
Ladies, who you are is not based on what you want to happen but it is based on what you need to happen. When you love someone 100% and they reciprocate less, you do not have balance. Balance is what makes love strong and it makes love enduring. I did not pray to the Lord to save my marriage, because he had already revealed to me that it was broken. I prayed to the Lord for the strength to let go... He gave that to me. I prayed to the Lord for peace... He gave that to me. I prayed to the Lord for my adult children to understand and know they are loved by both parents... He gave that to me. I prayed to the Lord for my ex-husband to be happy...He gave me peace that he is okay.
I thank God for everything I have learned in this chapter in my life. I cherish every experience and every memory. I am ready for what God has in mind for my future. I know I am prepared to embrace it. And now my next chapter begins...
Women empowerment after divorce
Dress from www.bestyoubyhts.com
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    Hello There!
    I'm Carla - mother, educator, business owner, and Certified Life Coach. I have a blast exploring new ideas, products, and services.  I love to share and hope to inspire you to do the same. Remember to enjoy life every day and always strive to be a BETTER YOU!

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